Internet dating cancer survivors
Julie blogs about her personal experience with leukemia and life from a patient’s perspective. She is a race walker, a dog lover, and a dedicated #bearcam watcher. I’m 32, I’m decent looking, I have a job I enjoy and family and friends I love.
My motto is “go with the flow”…well, more specifically, my e-mail tagline is “When you come to a fork in the road, take it” (Yogi Berra). I ended up telling a guy over a text last night that I’m a two-time cancer survivor.
If your cancer turns out to be a deal breaker, hopefully you have not gotten too attached to him or her.” Still, I know from listening to others in my support group that some people wait much longer, sometimes months to bring up “the big C”, especially if a fair amount of time has passed since their treatment.
I didn’t find anyone advocating this in my on-line research.
In her searingly honest blog, Penny Rutterford, 53, reveals how it feels to face the dating scene with a post cancer body and admits she fears men will 'recoil in horror' when they discover she only has one breast.'I imagine like many 50 something newly single women before me the prospect of meeting someone new and revealing my body to him makes me anxious,' says Penny.'I can now add to this fear a concern about whether the uniboob reveal might leave a man recoiling in horror.' Penny Rutterford, 53, says her deepest fear of dating again after splitting from her husband two years ago is telling potential suitors about her mastectomy and admits she fears men will 'recoil in horror'In her blog, which she started in 2015 towards the end of her treatment on her website pennyrutterford.com, Penny says: 'Well it’s been a struggle to find men of a compatible age who were bowled over by my personality when I had two tits, let alone one. ''I have been especially frustrated by the seemingly commonly held view that I will not be troubled by the usual body image issues that might beset a middle aged woman who finds herself single.
They can become tremendous teachers for friends and family, and their value for love and life in their basic forms is a positive attribute in any romantic relationship.
I, for one, am fully aware that I fall under the category of a “tell-all personality”, and I choose to embrace the thinking that “there will always be a risk of rejection, just as in any relationship between two individuals.
But if a new relationship is strong enough to overcome such a difficult emotional hurdle as cancer, think how strong it will be when faced with so many other life challenges that lie ahead.
A few initial rejections may be a small price to pay for the perfect life partner” (Richard Zmuda, I am hopeful I will find that person, but I also think it is important to put ourselves in the shoes of possible suitors.
Once you have had cancer, it is difficult to disengage from its effects on your life, but try and pretend for a moment that you never had cancer.